Brown Paper Packages Tied Up With String: July Favorite Things

I’m no Oprah but I do have a lot of favorite things that I can’t find excuses to talk about (or don’t find the time to write about in detail).  This is a quick rundown of stuff that I think is cool. Tell me what you think in the comments!

1. Jurassic World.  I mean, obviously. My parents refused to let me see the original until I was almost 9, but I was – for some unknown parent reason – allowed to read the Michael Crichton books as often as I wanted. I did finally get to watch Jurassic Park (rented from fellow dinosaur, Blockbuster Video) and I sat through it four times on our first three day rental. Getting to see the Lost World in theaters was a big big deal for me, and Jurassic World felt like that again. I loved it immensely and can’t wait to go again. Plus, Chris Pratt is handsome af and his pants are tight for no reason in all the best places. A+

Here is fine. Take your pants off plz.

 


 

2. On the Town.  This show was great and they were robbed of the Tony for choreography. I don’t particularly have any investment in this as a musical, but this staging is gorgeous and smart and if you’re in NYC, it’s worth the trip to TKTS. I’ve seen it twice already.

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3. Engraved Cock Rings from Gear Essentials.  Gear Essentials has some of my favorite wish list things, and these two rings are right at the top. If you know me, you know that my friends and I pretty much use cock rings as penis jewelry, instead of for their boner retention powers. I can’t bring myself to spend this kinda cash on a dick bracelet yet, but I’ll get myself there. I’m sure of it.  I measured my favorite one from high school and I’m pretty sure 2″ is the size I need.

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4. Adidas Sport Boxer Briefs.  Normally, thongs and jocks are my underwear of choice when it gets crazy hot in the city, but I discovered these amazing boxer briefs from a guy I followed home from the gym one night. He ended up eating my ass for almost two hours without wanting to cum and when I left, I told him I was taking his underwear because I liked the way he smelled. Turns out they’re insanely comfortable and I can’t get enough of them.  Plus also, the white ones are basically see-through41cIuGUo96L


 

Men’s Days at the Russian Turkish Bath. This is an amazing experience that is more amazing in the Winter than it is in the Summer, but an afternoon of fully naked time talking with new friends and occasional casual masturbation is exactly what I want out of my Summer days.  Plus your skin feels incredible afterwards. And you nap like a little baby.  If you’ve never gone, you’re doing yourself a disservice. Nut up and go. Or invite me to go with you as your chaperone!

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Edited to add: If you ever want to surprise me with something, my po box is always lookin to get filled up (just make sure you remind me to go check it!):
Tyler Dårlig Ulv
Post Office Box 20659
New York, NY 10021
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Unless you work at a dick factory, literally nothing on this blog is safe for work. So heads up: you’re gonna see penises, butts, general nudity, depictions of sexual interactions, and me saying words like dong, cock, wang, peenor, peen, jizz, bust, bate, fuck, stroke, and ballback, ad nauseam.



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