06 Oct In Defense Of: Watersports & Piss
It’s not for everyone. But you’re oh, so lucky if it’s for you.
Piss seems to be one of those things that really divides the people I have sex with on a regular basis. You’re either a ride or die bitch for watersports, or you’re “I dunno, just not that into it I guess. I think it’s gross.”
For me, I’m always excited when somebody says they’re into piss. When you’re going through the ‘learning about somebody’s sexual tastes’ litany, discovering this particular taste is like finding a door in your house you didn’t realize was there before. It opens up an opportunity for a kind of intimacy that quickly pushes beyond normal sexual/genital interaction, into something much more profound.
That seems a silly way to describe it, but it’s accurate, at least in my estimation. Pissing is something that, without really realizing or accounting for it, we do in private. For our whole lives. Even men pissing at urinals is not the communal fraternal activity the furniture of the room would often suggest. There are all sorts of rules about etiquette, and where to look and what sort of sounds to make, and how long you should take, and how many spaces to leave between you and the man already trying to urinate. All in addition unique phobias and shynesses associated with being able to relieve yourself in front of someone else (which may actually partly be due to some evolutionary survival stuff) . The truth is, when I’m doing that, I don’t care if someone looks (especially once I’ve already started) but they’re not part of it. If somebody tried to touch my dick while I was pissing at a public urinal I would freak the fuck out. Because that isn’t a shared experience.
Which is why opening it up to be a shared experience is often times such a foreign and dangerous-seeming scenario. I’m not the sort of person who can piss anywhere at any time with anyone. But there are a handful of dudes I’ve been able to make it happen with, and those times are always spectacular. As someone with an unpredictable pee shyness, the experience I imagine a man having when he’s holding his penis in front of me and trying to will the piss out of his bladder, is intense and electric with ideas of suspense, trust, desire, strain, relief, lust, and just piggy, dirty fun. That’s a pretty loaded scenario for anybody, but if there’s already chemistry there, this blasts it up to 11. It’s a new venue and slightly new use for a penis you’ve already been enjoying other ways.
It seems like I ought to distinguish here the difference in the fraternal bonding style of piss play that I’m interested in (picture shirtless guys running and jumping and hugging in lawn sprinklers spraying out piss), and the naughty/raunchy/dominating watersports action that you picture German skinhead bros finding appealing. That kinda shit holds my attention for about .5 seconds and then I’m bored and often grossed out by what’s happening. It seems wasteful and disrespectful and just plain yucky.
But it is a feeling without equal to have a bro (your brother, your lover, your partner, whatever your dumb word for it is) lay on top of you, and just release himself that way; just completely relax himself and trust you so thoroughly that he can, while staring you in the face, totally empty his bladder. While you feel his weight and hold his body, you can feel the warm wetness of his piss saturating his own clothes and soaking into yours, and spilling over his genitals and yours while you stare into his eyes and just totally accept him for what he is. That shit is EPIC and UNPARALLELED.
All of this is to set up this series of gifs from a tumblr I’ve grown to adore, Piglandia, which is sadly falling victim (like all the rest of tumblr) to the Nothing, that is consuming video content from everyone at an alarming rate. It’s worth noting, as you scroll through these gifs, that they both have large, prominent erections during this, and that is something I understand completely:
Feeling that wet warmth emerge from a penis and spread all over your skin, and especially over your own penis causes almost an angry monkey-type of masturbation outta me, which has cost me many a load over the years. I can’t help myself. Masturbating with your brother’s piss is one of the most incredible things you’re ever gonna do.
If you’re not one for piss, generally, but you wanna know more, start with yourself! I love love love hosing myself down in my gym shower right after a good workout. I love the smell and the feel of my own piss soaking me before I get all nice and clean again. Find somebody who will let you watch them piss, or wants to watch you. Those are excellent and frequent segues into further, more connected piss play.
However you get there, I sincerely recommend you get there. You’re missing out.