22 Jan Monday Masturbators: Ultra HD Greasy Penis Obsession Edition
This is a weird one.
After yesterday’s post, I figured I might strive for a return to form here. Not that it isn’t good to drop some reality into things, now and then. But it’s good to get distracted too.
It’s Monday, and I’m always trying to build up the back catalog of Monday Masturbators on here, so let’s talk about MonsterCockRobin. I’ve definitely seen that handle and this enormous, uncircumcised penis around the bate world (and maybe literally on BateWorld) before, but it wasn’t until I stumbled upon this dude’s wicked vague XTube profile that I started to get curious.
Robin has over 200 videos on XTube, all featuring almost obsessively similar croppings, setups, and activities. They’re all cataloged by number (the fact that we’re up to number 256 leads me to believe there must be a few dozen videos from the early days that haven’t made it into the collection), and feature super direct, third person descriptions, like “robin jerking his 9 inch oiled cock,” or “robin jerks his shaved oiled uncut monstercock.” It almost seems like strategic SEO keyword manipulation, but about oiled cocks, instead of Amazon.com.
At any rate, only the loosest of details are offered by Robin’s About Me page (he lives in the Netherlands and is Bi-Sexual) and he’s managed to create and upload all of these 200+ videos in just 12 short months. His face is cropped well out of every clip, though he dips slightly into frame in a few, revealing nothing that should encourage him to be so discreet; he seems handsome and beardy. I’d be thrilled to watch his slackjawed, glazed-eye penis face while he did these sessions.
In the three clips I want to share here, Robin starts hard, masturbates (sometimes in an unfocused manner, sometimes super fixated and fistful), and cums, while nearly drowned in oil I can only assume he’s purchasing by the drum. The ambient sound on these is pretty epic, for the connoisseurs in the audience. I recommend headphones for the full effect:
241 LUBED JERKOFF
[SOURCE] This is probably my favorite of the bunch, as it offers the cleanest audio, and you can really hear the *pwup* *puwp* *pwup* of his big shaved balls slapping on his greasy shaved ballback. If you can learn to love the sounds of penising, it’ll really open up a new dimension of stuff for you.
266 CUMSHOT SLOWMOTION
[SOURCE] I’m a sucker for slow-motion sperming. I’ll always watch slomo clips of nutting.
156 ROBIN JERKS HIS SHAVED OILED UNCUT MONSTERCOCK
[SOURCE] This is the video I jacked off to last night (and probably again as soon as I post this. This seems like one of the more obsessy clips I’ve seen so far. This doesn’t strike me as a pleasant evening of jackin it at home. This has some of the hallmarks of the compulsive masturbator “omg I can’t stop penising for even a single second or I’ll die” vibe that really gets my nuts churning. It’s tough to explain why that’s so enticing except that it is sometimes an analog for how I feel when I’m masturbating; it’s less about the joy of bate, and more about the immediate necessity of penis. The inexplicable “have to” that controls serious masturbators.
It’s nice to be able to show you guys weird stuff sometimes, instead of just the blaahh hot guys showing off for the camera.
And these ones are definitely weird. But still incredibly erotic (what a terrible word 🙄) and stimulating. There’s so much going on in the subtext of Robin’s videos (the cropping, the angles, the obsessive labeling) that I am certain I would like to know this person. That last video especially makes me want to sit between his greasy legs and watch his face while he watches his big dong bounce up and down.
Penising isn’t always about beauty as we know it from porn. It’s about dipping into some slouchy, spitty, primal stuff that we are privileged as men to share with one another.